Billy Joel Opens Up About Suicide Attempts & More in New Documentary

In the recently premiered documentary, Billy Joel: And So It Goes, iconic musician Billy Joel opens up about a particularly troubled chapter of his life, revealing two suicide attempts tied to a complex romantic relationship. Joel's candid reflections were made during a film that debuted at the Tribeca Festival in New York on June 4, 2025. This documentary provides an emotional and raw insight into the pivotal moments that shaped the artist's musical journey and personal life. Such revelations illustrate the deep connections between personal turmoil and the creative process that artists often encapsulate in their work.

Billy Joel's struggles began in his early 20s when he was a member of the band Attila. At that time, he lived with his bandmate, Jon Small, Small’s wife, Elizabeth Weber, and their child. As Joel spent more time with Elizabeth, emotions intensified, leading to his confession to Small, “I'm in love with your wife.” This admission not only shattered the band Attila but also ruptured the once-strong friendship between Joel and Small. The personal and professional turmoil that ensued from the affair with Weber plunged Joel deeper into despair, illustrating the profound impact of personal entanglements on his mental health.

After the breakup of the band and the severed friendship, Joel's life spiraled into a dangerous realm. He found himself homeless, soaking in feelings of guilt, and battling severe depression. These overwhelming emotions led him to sleep in laundromats and nurture thoughts of suicide. Inside the documentary, Joel shares that he reached a point where he believed, “I don’t want to live anymore,” encapsulating the intense pain and hopelessness he faced. His first suicide attempt occurred after taking an overdose of sleeping pills provided by his sister, Judy Molinari, which led to Joel falling into a prolonged coma.

Despite surviving the first incident, Joel's struggles continued. In a second perilous attempt, he ingested a bottle of lemon Pledge. Fortunately, Jon Small, though their friendship was in turmoil, found and rescued Joel, taking him to the hospital. Reflecting on the incident, Joel acknowledges, “Even though our friendship was blowing up, Jon saved my life.” This shows a complex tapestry of emotions where deep-seated love and equally profound betrayal coexist, further illustrating the human condition's intricacies that Joel navigated amid his personal and creative journey.

Following these suicide attempts, Joel realized the necessity of addressing his mental health struggles. He checked himself into a mental health facility for observation, an initiative that marked a turning point towards recovery. It was here that he decided to channel his turmoil and emotional depth into his music. “I got out of the observation ward, and I thought to myself, you can utilize all those emotions to channel that stuff into music,” Joel stated, highlighting how art becomes a salvation path. This transformation and utilization of personal pain into creative outlets underscore Joel’s resilience and his journey of emotional recovery and redemption.

Joel's candidness about these difficult times not only serves to illuminate his personal resilience but also sheds light on broader issues of mental health struggles, especially in high-stress creative industries. The revelations in his documentary not only elicit empathy and understanding from fans but also encourage broader discussions on mental health awareness, art as therapy, and the human capacity to recover and transform despite facing overwhelming adversity. The documentary is slated to air on HBO in July, promising to provide viewers with a comprehensive understanding of the legendary artist's life story and the powerful link between his personal struggles and his enduring musical legacy.